Rise of Skywalker Spoiler Memes

Here are a bunch of spoiler memes from the Rise of Skywalker kept here, so proceed at your own risk.

Passerby on Tatooine: What’s your name?
Rey:

When you find out that Rey is Palpatine’s granddaughter and if Anakin is also the offspring of the emperor then Rey is actually Kylo Ren/Ben Solo’s aunt

J.J. Abrams after seeing Rian Johnson try and “subvert expectations” with the Last Jedi

The Critics: Rise of Skywalker is trash
Me:

J.J. Abrams: *shows Luke lifting his X-Wing out of murky water, features the voices of like every Jedi ever, shows the twin suns of Tatooine again, shows Leia learning the ways of the Force*
Me (through tears):

The audience looking for the Rise of Skywalker’s plot continuity with The Last Jedi

When Rian Johnson decides to junk JJ Abrams’ ideas for Episode 8 and then JJ Abrams comes back and junks everything Rian Johnson did with Episode 8 for Episode 9

People online: hey don’t you know the plot doesn’t make any sense and they totally invalidate the achievements of the original movies plus another bunch of planet killers as the bad guys I mean come on and there aren’t any stakes because they fake-out the deaths of both Chewbacca and Poe’s definitely girlfriend AND C3PO getting his mind wiped even and why don’t they address what Finn was going to tell Rey in the movie? I mean-
Me:

George Lucas watching JJ Abrams retread everything from the endings of either Revenge of the Sith or Return of the Jedi from the around-the-galaxy montage to the return to the Tatooine homestead

Young Voices contributor and Tufts student writing about economics. Published: The American Conservative and The Washington Examiner. @ahardtospell

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